I will be graduating in less than two months. I never thought it would come so fast. I know I am not the only one who has a lot of questions, uncertainties, and stress caused by up-coming graduation. After all, we all got used to the comfort of the JBU system. Our days were filled with school-work to do, having lunch and dinner in the caf, going to the gym once in a while, visiting other dorms and hanging out with the group of friends we felt the most comfortable with. If we ever had any problem with a class, we could always go talk to the professor or ask a classmate for some tutoring. If we were hungry in the middle of the night, a ride to Taco Bell or McDonalds would solve the problem.
We got used to doing this for four years. In two months I will be asking myself this question: “Now what?” But I have actually asked myself this question before. “What will I do now that I will not get to see my friends every day?” “Will I find the job of my dreams?” “Where will I live? Home? Move out?”
All of these questions have been on my mind this semester and part of last semester. I started to feel afraid of the future because the truth is, I have no idea what my future looks like. And I hate that. I hate not knowing what is going to happen. Uncertainty makes me very insecure and unconfident.
These past days I have been reflecting on that. I was trying to figure out where my fear comes from. Does it come from not knowing if I will be able to provide for myself? Does it come from other people? Does it come from things not happening the way I want them to? I think all of these fears are the consequence of one main thing: not trusting God. It can be so difficult to trust in God sometimes, especially in hard moments.
Even Peter lacked some faith when Jesus asked him to come to him walking over the water.
I realized that not trusting people comes from not trusting God. I realized that being afraid of post-graduation events comes from not trusting God. Why are we so worried if he is always in control? I think trusting in God is a discipline. We need to practice it if we want to be good at it. In those moments of high uncertainty is when we have to just let him act and do his will. After all, he will always be there with us wherever we go. We need to trust in God before trusting other people, trusting our own skills, trusting our resources, or any other thing we rely on that make us confident and comfortable.
Here is some encouragement for all those graduating and also for those who are not graduating:
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13