From Oct. 12 to Oct. 23, “Matiox Nana,” a gallery by Maria Fernanda Chinchilla, a graphic design and photography senior from Guatemala, was exhibited at the Windgate Visual Art East student gallery at John Brown University.
On opening night, showgoers were filled with emotions as they learned that “Matiox Nana”, which means “thank you, Grandma” in the Kaqchikel language, was Chinchilla’s grief journey after losing her grandma in 2020. According to Chinchilla, the gallery changed her personally and professionally as it marks the beginning of her discovering the type of art she wants to create.
“Matiox Nana” is a compilation of 29 photos that recall Chinchilla’s process of accepting her grandmother’s death.
“My grandmother died during my first semester here and I wasn’t able to go back home for the funeral. This was very difficult for me to get over and it got me to a point where I didn’t feel like she was dead,” Chinchilla said.
The title was intentionally written in the Kaqchikel language, Chinchilla’s grandmother’s first language, to represent her indigenous background, which was something “Doña Juanita” wore proudly. All photo descriptions were also written in English, Spanish and Kaqchikel.
“I felt like I had to do it in her first language because this was for her, and for her to understand,” Chinchilla said.
In her process, Chinchilla decided to travel to the places she only knew through her grandmother’s traveling stories that she heard growing up. It was after this decision she learned that she needed to create a senior gallery to graduate. So she decided to combine her two processes in an attempt to heal and leave behind her denial of this tragedy and move toward acceptance.
“I knew I had to do something about it, and I thought what better way than with something that I enjoy doing – taking photos – and also something that I use to express myself and tell stories,” Chinchilla said.
Chinchilla spent the following three years planning and executing this gallery.
“I decided which places of the many she went to I was going to visit. I always knew, though, that I was going to visit and start with Toledo in Spain and end my trip with Venice in Italy. These were the places she talked about the most,” Chinchilla said.
From the scenes in Toledo and Venice, Chinchilla picked out the color palette. Most of the photos had a blue hue to them, aligning with how she felt. To every place she went, she brought a sketchbook to draw and write what she felt at that exact moment.
“For example; the photo that comes to mind because, I guess, was key to this process is the one with the grandpa throwing a peace sign at me. In the first few photos, he wasn’t looking at the camera and out of nowhere he just looked back at me and signed at me. It felt incredible. This photo reminded me of how grief works. It’s unexpected; it waves at you out of nowhere,” Chinchilla said.
“The last photo, where I say to my grandmother “I let you go,” is also one of my favorites. The scene is just a boat, one which at first you can see all the details of, but eventually, it gets further away until it disappears,” she added.
While solo traveling for almost two years, Chinchilla was also growing personally and finding the right people she could trust to help her through her grief.
“I honestly feel that this gallery isn’t just mine; it’s also of everybody that was there for me during this process,” Chinchilla said.
Gustavo Maida, one of Chinchilla’s friends who was with her through her journey, also described the gallery as feeling deeply personal.
“The project became personal for me too because throughout our friendship I’ve been with her in her grieving process. Maf has told me all the stories her grandma used to say to her and so I have been able to meet her grandmother through her,” Maida said.
Maida helped Chinchilla select the final photos during postproduction and set the final details for the opening.
The gallery had an extraordinary reception, with almost a hundred people showing up for opening night.
“I was very nervous. I knew my close friends would come, but I expected around 20 to 25 friends at most. It was shocking to see that many people showed up; at one point people were getting in line to enter the gallery and I could not believe it,” Chinchilla said.
Many people exited the gallery crying, which was what impressed Chinchilla the most.
“I was impressed because people I hadn’t met shared intimate and personal details of how the gallery resonated with them. It made me feel like wow! Maybe I do have a talent for this. It was enough for me to know that for at least one person the gallery meant something, so the night exceeded my expectations,” she ended.
Visitors were impressed by how beautifully Chinchilla told her story. They were able to share their thoughts with Chinchilla by leaving a note to the artist, a customary act in student galleries:
“It was beautiful; I’ve never thought you could create a story like that through photographs; it was truly touching,” Rachel De Salles said.
“It was relatable because when you lose someone and you don’t get to say goodbye, it’s hard to let them go. It was beautiful to be able to see her journey of her to find closure and letting her grandma go even though she never got to say goodbye,” Anna Hobby said.
“It gives you a different perspective on how you can uniquely say goodbye and carry your ancestors with you through experiencing their stories,” Andrea Amaya said.
Additionally, Chinchilla laid out a second notebook where she asked visitors to write what they would say to their grandmother.
“I think it is important to remember that, for those who still have their grandparents alive, talking to them and calling doesn’t even take you 5 minutes. Grandparents need to be heard,” Chinchilla explained.
As for what is next; Chinchilla is currently looking to find a space in Guatemala to do another exhibition. She knows she wants to continue storytelling through art and focus on social documentary photography. Below a few pieces of the gallery are included. For more information on Chinchilla’s art, you can visit @astromaf and @byastromaf on Instagram.
Photos courtesy of Mafer Chinchilla / Sofia Santana