Trump: Choose a side already

On the afternoon of June 16, our nation received a blessing from the gods of the electoral process. This blessing came down to us on a golden escalator in the form of Donald J. Trump. As he descended upon the unsuspecting crowd, we all thought the same thing: “What’s the host of ‘The Apprentice’ doing on CNN?” Then we began to listen, and realized that this titan of NBC programming was running for president. We also realized that Trump is a pretty blunt racist, but a blunt racist on his way to the White House.

The Republican Party has finally been able to offer up a heroic contender for the republican nomination. This is, after all, the party that gave us national icons like Rutherford B. Hayes, Warren G. Harding, Howard Taft, Herbert Hoover, Richard Nixon, George Bush and the other George Bush.

None of them can measure up though, to the new presidential front-runner who is, in his own words, “the best at the military” and “really rich.” Sounds like the kind of leader Americans need right now. We need a leader who can recognize that the diplomatic deal to keep Iran away from a nuclear weapon is “incompetent.” So incompetent that six other nations and the E.U. apparently didn’t know what they were doing when they negotiated it. And Donald Trump would be the perfect leader to fix that, because no one knows incompetence like Donald Trump.

What qualities do Trump’s rivals possess that Trump doesn’t already have? Sure, Clinton may have years of experience working with other governments as the Secretary of State, but Trump has plenty of experience in foreign affairs. Like when he went to court against the Scottish government when they built a wind farm near one of his hotels and ruined his view. Or when he got the attention of the entire Mexican government to the point they called his immigration plans “racist” and “absurd.” If that isn’t diplomacy, what is?

Does Bernie Sanders have a consistent, progressive record and 20 years in congress? Has Sanders been fighting for African American and LGBT rights his entire life? Absolutely. But Trump was consistently the host of “The Apprentice” for over 10 years. And that is consistency that the American public can really trust. They’ll just need to forget he’s switched parties twice in the past 15 years and has donated money to both liberals and conservatives.

Some people may say that Trump will say anything for attention or that he tries to buy politicians, but we all know these are characteristics of a wildly successful American businessman. Nothing says success like his companies going bankrupt four times in the past 18 years. Trump says these were “shrewd and calculated maneuvers,” according to the Washington Post. These maneuvers are signs that assure Americans that they can look forward to 4-8 years of a shrewd and calculated presidency.

In this bizarre race for a new president in 2016, we can all rest easy knowing that there is an eye of the storm. Donald Trump is that eye, as he continues to surge to the top of the polls. America doesn’t need to join the rest of the world in progressive agendas and federal aid to the lower class. We don’t need better schools or cheaper healthcare. We need to reach back into the past and “Make America Great Again.” Godspeed, Donald.

Merrill is a junior, majoring in biology. He can be reached at MerrillT@jbu.edu.